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Welcome to Percotran -Part XXIII By: Richard Davidson on 2/4/2003; 10:27 PM Captain Citidroid 3745 was worried. Appointing Eldridge Badson Admiral just didnt seem like a good idea. Home Office kept reassuring her that he was the best choice, and she had to believe them, or shed be fired, since her interface was definitely a two-way street. Lieutenant Scurvy, who was actually Command Major Infantryman 11123P, saluted her. Stop that, you idiot, she spat angrily. Sorry Captain, force of habit. He looked fairly sheepish, for a soldier. Well, if you dont want Admiral Badson up here shooting my men, youll get rid of your stupid habits at once. Suddenly, on the horizon, there was a small mushroom cloud, and then they heard the explosion. That looked like a nuclear detonation! exclaimed Lieutenant Scurvy. Captain Citidroid 3745 was impressed with his observational skills. Shouldnt we investigate? he asked, impressing her all the more. Of course we should, she replied, smacking him in the head just as hard as she could. Home Office was quite interested too, and her head was on fire from all the communications racing through her synapses. A holographic image of Supreme God and Chief Executive Officer J. Lazwell Thurgoods head appeared on deck, and Captain Citidroid 3745 almost fell over. I hate when you do that, she snapped. Sorry my darling, he said tenderly. You could warn me, you know, she steamed, its not like I dont have ten million interfaces in my skull. I said I was sorry, he grimaced. Now dont push me. I could have you vaporized from where I sit. That was what she loved most about Thurgood; his complete and utter lack of morals. She steered the S.S. Rattlesnake towards the rapidly dissipating cloud, and came to rest where the water was boiling, as hundreds of fish began bobbing to the surface. Whats that? she asked Lieutenant Scurvy. Whats what? he asked, a look of confusion adorning his face, as usual. That! She pointed to a smoldering metal ball, about the size of a mans head, that was bobbing up and down in the steamy water. It was Captain Pearsons head, of course. It was made from an alloy that could withstand a 12 Megaton blast, even if his human features couldnt. Using the ships robot arm, the crew brought it aboard, placing it in a specially designed cargo hold, where it was decontaminated, and scanned by 746 separate identification programs. A shudder went through Admiral Badson, as Captain Citidroid 3745 told him what shed found over the com system. He had the distinct feeling she shouldve left it in the vast reaches of Oceania. Ill be right up, he groaned, wishing he were somewhere else. He was careful not to think about any of the ways a Citidroid could be murdered in cold blood. Technician 986U soon had interfaced the Android head with the ships computer, and they were soon able to access Captain Pearsons memory, which played like a movie on a small viewscreen that flickered gently in the gathering twilight. Most of it was Pirate nonsense; drinking, killing, playing cards, and the like, but when it got to the part where Alexander was standing on the plank, there was finally something interesting enough to capture the attention of Captain Citidroid 3745, Admiral Badson, Supreme God and Chief Executive Officer J. Lazwell Thurgood, and the entirety of Home Office. But what I want you all to think about, and really THINK about, is the hilarious notion that you had in your possession an employee of Percolex, who had stock in not only that company but Ecotron as well, stock that wasnt diluted by the Merger. Alexanders words stunned Badson, who thought hed heard it all by now, but obviously hadnt. His eyes glazed over like only those belonging to a man craving power, and he laughed as Thurgoods hologram bellowed, its obviously a trick. Badson had been holding in his hand a small iron bar, and focusing his mind on the complete works of Smallrons Advanced Particle Physics, Volumes I through XLV, he suddenly whacked Captain Citidroid 3745 in the temple, and as she fell to the deck unconscious, Thurgoods hologram flickered, and disappeared. Badson couldnt help but think to himself, I guess she didnt see THAT coming. A stunned Lieutenant Scurvy tried to rush Badson, and was immediately vaporized by Badsons EX11 Disintegrator, which, although standard issue to Bogotron Executives, hed snuck aboard undetected, all the while getting an enormous kick out of the ineptitude of Bogotron Security. Never rush a Corporate Officer, Badson said with a grin, looking down at the smoldering pile of ashes that had been a completely unconvincing Pirate only microseconds earlier. He immediately assumed command, locking Captain Citidroid 3745 in the brig, and hooking her up to one of the most powerful Coma Inducers Bogotron Affiliated had ever designed, as the ship came about, and headed back towards the last known coordinates of the island they had passed in last nights storm. Badson was operating on instinct now, something no cursed Citidroid would ever understand. Chief Detection Officer Harwood, who no longer had to wear an eyepatch, and a dozen crewmembers, were sweeping the ocean for any signs of life; any signs at all. Hes out here somewhere, Badson said, in a quiet, serious voice, as he lit a cigar, and shot the Ships Chef just for fun. He really wasnt hungry anyway. Badson simply couldnt believe his luck in finding the Android head, and the valuable knowledge contained within. For the entire journey hed given himself up for dead, but now he was himself; his real self, once again. Sure, his hair was falling out in clumps, which was a sad testament to the effectiveness of the Ships decontamination abilities, but for the first time in his life he was free. And he had his own ship. He wondered how long it would be until a fleet of Bogotron Attack Helicopters would appear overhead. He probably shouldve been more concerned with the small torpedo sub that was following at a safe distance, though. He couldnt help but give in to the fantasy of owning a controlling percentage of Percotran stock, and all the benefits that came with it, until a voice shattered his delusions from the bow. It was Chief Detection Officer Harwood. I see something! Badson leaned over the edge of the bow, and could barely make out the shape of some bamboo logs, some distance ahead. Thats it! he cried, having the time of his life. Once again, his instinct had been on the money. Badson didnt even notice the drool running down his chin, as they drew closer to the wreckage of Alexanders raft, which, although sturdy, hadnt survived what would be considered one of Oceanias smaller storms. Its only passenger was a severely dehydrated Puali Lizard. Only a few miles away a single outrigger canoe was making its way back towards Oanahuana Mi.
RE: Welcome to Percotran -Part XXIII By: Chie Theresa Fujioka on 2/5/2003; 8:32 AM Bravo as usual.
RE: Welcome to Percotran -Part XXIII By: Richard Davidson on 2/5/2003; 6:03 PM Thanks! For some reason, I fell asleep last night thinking maybe I'd written a bad one this time. Usually the characters have long since interacted, and I know where I'm going before I start, but on Part XXIII, I just wanted to keep writing, so I did. Even I didn't see that outrigger canoe coming. I thought Badson was about to find Alexander lashed to the broken mast, unconscious, or something. Now, who knows what's going to happen? Guess I should've known the Bahini wouldn't go away. They're a very resourceful people, you know. I'm going to try another one tonight, if at all possible, and maybe tomorrow too, because I'm going on VACATION Saturday, so there's a fairly good chance the folks at Percotran will be on hold for a week.
RE: Welcome to Percotran -Part XXIII By: Rachelle King on 3/11/2003; 1:40 AM "Lieutenant Scurvy" clever!
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