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Call me woman By: Chie Theresa Fujioka on 7/4/2003; 9:26 AM Sip me, sir. My sexy coffee and I dance a flavour you never knew a gentle creamy heart in equilibrium with the bitter black past add a touch of sugar to delight You with the utterly foolish idea that I do not burn the tongue.
RE: Call me woman By: Richard Davidson on 7/4/2003; 11:53 AM Man that's good! I'm not kidding, that works on so many levels, I don't know where to begin, so I'll begin at the beginning. "Sip me, sir," is already KILLINGLY GOOD, but to tie it to "My sexy coffee and I," is truly the place where a good, sexy line transcends the libido into art. This poem is HOT, and I'm not trying to pun here, but it works, doesn't it? "the utterly foolish idea that I do not burn the tongue..." Wow! That is like a full-on poetry body slam, that drives this piece home like a concrete pillar into the forgiving sand of a river spillway. Maybe your best work ever. I really liked it a lot, as you may have guessed.
RE: Call me woman By: R.A.B. on 7/7/2003; 9:12 AM The association of one's emotions to a coffe is kinda great.
RE: Call me woman By: Chie Theresa Fujioka on 7/7/2003; 3:09 PM I think I like Richard's comment more than RAB's. How about some friendly competition? *hint hint* Kidding. Check out my new website. http://www.pubbawup.net/VaguelyWeird
RE: Call me woman By: Seth Dillingham on 7/7/2003; 3:46 PM I agree with Richard... this is the best work you've published on this site, Chie. Every time I read it, I want to share it with someone else. Seth
RE: Call me woman By: R.A.B. on 7/7/2003; 7:09 PM *lol at Chie* =)
RE: Call me woman By: Chie Theresa Fujioka on 7/9/2003; 3:59 AM I think, the thing is Seth, I'm growing up. I've found myself struggling with my style... as I stuggle with my life. I've been wanting a more emily dickison+sylvia plath+margaret atwood+edna st vincent millay style (haha), and I've been trying to stretch myself out of the simple adoration and devotion poems, out of the morality poems, not to say I won't do them, but they don't touch me the same way. My goal is to write some lyrics that have meaning, hopefully in a bjork-ladytron triphop+indie pop genre. Because I have this illusion that I can sing, and I want to start taking a microphone, my violin, a guitar, whatever, and letting people hear. But thanks all for your feedback... I need it, since I'm trying to gain back momentum. Especially since you've seen the best and the worst of me.
RE: Call me woman By: Richard Davidson on 7/11/2003; 12:19 AM Chie, I've always read a lot of poetry, and when I first started, quite a bit of the stuff I thought was great turned out to be kind of pedestrian, once I realized how many people were writing essentially the same thing. Poetry tends to be too self-indulgent, and great thoughts are buried in avalanches of rotting adjectives, coating pure expression in kind of an icky film. I've never patronized you in any way. I've left a brief comment that says I liked the poem; or I've left meaningless gibberish for you to ponder; or maybe if I didn't really "get" the poem, I left no comment, or even mentioned that I don't quite get it. But what I've honestly come to cherish about your work, and why I put you a good bit above most writers, including myself, is your intense dedication to being succint. The only thing better than good words is the absence of unnecessary words, and God knows, you push minimalism like Elvis's doctor pushed barbituates. That in itself wouldn't be enough to get me, though, and what I truly admire, (and I can back this up with just about anything I've ever written,) is your ability to leave convention behind, and truly just create what you feel like creating, and have fun challenging the boundaries of the rational world, which is a bore, as any cool person knows. I may be more bizarre than you, but probably not. Few people know this, but it's not a contest.
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