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Love Your Wife? Must Be Gay By: Brian Webber on 10/22/2001; 1:22 PM I swear I heard this once. Now, I'm not married, but I would like to be some day. To a wonderful, gorgeuous smart and funny woman. And maybe even have kids. I'd go so far as to say I'm something of a romantic. A straight male romantic. "That makes you a fag man!" is what I heard from some idiot I told that too. I was open about my feelings towards the opposite sex, and this guy has the gall to say I'm gay? When you break down his response to my comments about my desire to be in a monogamous relationship, what he's saying is that any man who actually LOVES his wife, rather than feeling trapped, or gets married for monetary reasons, or just goes with a trophy wife, is gay. Does that make sense? I love women. I'm not some chauvenisitc pig, or total misogynyst. And I want to marry, and make love to, a woman. So exactly HOW does that make me gay? Is it so wrong for a man to actually experience the joy of being in love? Could someone please explain this to me? I happen to think that Pamela Anderson is a rather unattractive woman. I've said this aloud to my friends, and this as also brought on speculation as to my sexual orientation. C'mon, look at her! How can any guy find THAT sexy? Are you guys telling to to be straight I HAVE to like looking at her fake boobs? Christ I'd rather be gay! Have any of you maried blokes out there ever experienced this? Please print your stories below in the Reply area, or even write an article of your own.
RE: Love Your Wife? Must Be Gay By: ScottN on 7/10/2002; 9:20 PM Now, I'm not married, but I would like to be some day. To a wonderful, gorgeuous smart and funny woman Brian, all I can tell you is that when you find the woman you want to marry, she WILL be wonderful, gorgeous, smart, and funny. And nobody will ever be able to convince you otherwise. Because they'll be wrong. I'm more in love with Mrs. ScottN now than the day I proposed to her. Your friends are jerks.
RE: Love Your Wife? Must Be Gay By: Brian Webber on 7/10/2002; 10:24 PM Well they aren't my friends anymore anyway. I WIN! :-)
RE: Love Your Wife? Must Be Gay By: Chie Theresa Fujioka on 7/12/2002; 12:47 AM she is ugly... but then again im female DOes that mean I have no say?? *weeps*
RE: Love Your Wife? Must Be Gay By: Richard Davidson on 7/15/2002; 2:01 AM Pamela Anderson is attractive in that "I'm a complete idiot with absolutely no redeeming values and my lips and breasts are fake" kind of way that eludes most of us with actual brain cells in place of that spongy stuff. Men die at her feet, but her Podiatrist tells us there's a strange, insidious fungus that grows there at a rate of approximately three micrometers per cancelled series. Her performance on "Baywatch" was almost legendary, causing William Shakespeare to rise from the dead, sell all his codpieces, and cut several scenes from Hamlet, only to commit suicide with a silver and mother of pearl handled flintlock pistol, carved entirely from the branch of a widowed Oak. Pam's strongest feature, or features, are her eyes, behind which one can sense the vapid shallowness craved by men with an IQ of 7 or higher, but not too high, and creating an illusion of life, where there is actually only a Ray O Vac Super Strength Industrial Calcium Largos battery, and a pint of hand smoothed cream cheese with those little Pimentos. Pam's rear end was manufactured in Britain, and it took several teams of engineers 35 hours a day for 978 years to get the exact shape, and to settle on a material. At first, polystyrene, with a layer of peach Jell-O was considered, but in those early days of the process, the entire buttocks were contained in red pinstriped cotton; only after they developed natural looking human skin did they realize that the Jell-O would attract ants. By then, Earth had already conquered much of the known solar system, and fictional materials such as Briaglo and Coomberxylon existed in the imaginations of at least two criminally insane fashion designers, who were being held in an irradiated cell constructed entirely of burnt adjectives. Several of the puppies exploded during the early days of testing, and out of that was born a twenty seven million, three hundred and forty six thousand, nine hundred forty three day run on Broadway that critics called "Witty, Funny, Depressing, and Obscenely Tedious," breaking all known box office records, and creating seventy two new dance steps, resulting in eventual peace between the Fweehee people of Neptus VI, and the Tahitian Tree Frog, which was on the verge of extinction anyway, but had time for a quick smoke. And now, on to sports. In the three legged Petri Dish stuffing event, Southampton is leading Bora-Bora 13-3. John Oxford Thames Bellyfull Concubine Middle School is in a dead tie with Trailer Park Central in the Six Man Badger Eating Marathon, with 93 Badgers eaten per side. Moving to the weather, I expect Spring to come even earlier next year, due to accumulations of cotton yarn down at Wealthy's Notions and Such. Summer will be followed by Autumn once again, but look for some new colors in the fall foilage, due to all that nuclear testing and a type of sentient dye that is quickly taking over the Eastern Seabord. Damaged hardware, other than toasters, will be accepted by the local Thought Police, who will be interested to hear several of your opinions, and I'm not talking about who wore the best colors at the Emmies, if you know what I mean, and I'm sure you do.
RE: Love Your Wife? Must Be Gay By: Chie Theresa Fujioka on 7/19/2002; 2:02 AM go R! have you read hawaii? seems like it
RE: Love Your Wife? Must Be Gay By: Richard Davidson on 7/23/2002; 8:11 PM Hawaii? Was there badger eating?
RE: Love Your Wife? Must Be Gay By: Suzanne Corbell on 5/19/2005; 12:51 PM To be a true lover of women, you are a bright star in the galaxy of ordinary men. It is still a man's world, even though women are rising to their former power(s). How vexing it is to be a good and pure woman in this day and age. I think the Bible (or the men that wrote and organized it) set the world against us, as we are still kept under the thumbs of many men, in many minds. I believe that women in general have more love to give than men. Perhaps that is why we are Mothers. Women want peace in the world, and in general are not hungry to profit from wars and political upheaval. Most women want the love of a good man, but have difficulty in keeping that good man once they find him. This is because of brainwashing. I am a product of this. I grew up in Los Angeles and my parent divorced when I was a teen. My father had a bad drinking problem and that definitely carried over into his marriage to my mother and his parenting of me. I certainly didn't grow up with the 'fairy tale image of happily ever after' but I totally bought into it. I am puzzled by this, as I am now struggling in my own marriage. Where did I get suckered into this crap? I think it started with Disney movies depicting Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty and Snow White with their princes. Then, perhaps Doris Day movies...oh, how I looked up to her! Then, I recall the debut of The Brady Bunch and Bewitched...I was totally bewtiched by those TV shows as a child...and I wanted a husband like I saw on T.v.--devoted to their beautiful, charming wives who could do no wrong.
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