Outsmart Authority

By Kade Roybal

It's Saturday night and all you’re asking is to go to a party with some friends. You assure your parents that there is nothing to worry about, but they still won’t relent. I mean really, its like you’re the only kid in your grade who isn’t allowed to do whatever he wants. Frustrating? We’ve all had the feeling. People always say “you can catch more flies with honey” but when those “flies” are annoying you, you just have an urge to squash them. Well, resist the temptation because being on your parents good side is a great place to be.

First of all, plan ahead. If you know there is a party on the weekend, make sure to really put on the charm during the week. As much as you hate to, work ahead in school and make sure your parents notice. If you make a good grade, don’t forget to casually mention that. For instance, at the dinner table bring up something you thought was “interesting” on your science test that day. Usually, parents respond to these comments by asking you what you scored. This gives you a perfect opportunity to flaunt your grade. If you make a bad one, avoid that topic of conversation by asking them about their day at work. Listen to every detail and keep them talking. This way, there is no time for them to concentrate on you.

Always remember to help out around the house during the week. Hang up your towels, set the table or even take those dirty clothes to the laundry room. These things seem trivial, but to parents (especially moms) they are a big deal. Somehow, these household chores show responsibility. To us, it may seem like it doesn’t matter, but you’re not trying to convince a teenager to let you go out on Saturday. You are trying to convince a parent. Think like a parent and you can get what you want.

Thirdly, look at your approach. How did you first ask your parents to go to the party? When you know there is a good chance that they will say no, be sure to plan ahead. Look at the advantages of going to the party and be ready to stress them in your plea. Will you, being out of the way, give your parents time to go for dinner, just the two of them? That could definitely be appealing to them. Parents tend to lean toward plans that are more convenient. If you can’t drive, think of places that are near the party where you parents would need to go. Is Aunt Marge’s house nearby? If so, be sure to mention that it is about time for them to pay her a visit. Making them realize that this party could work to their advantage will greatly increase your chances of attending. If you’ve mentioned all the strong points, and the answer is still “no,” be sure not to get frustrated. As much as we teenagers hate to admit it, patience is a strong aspect of getting what you want. Stay calm. The urge to yell and scream will come, but if you give in to that urge, your chances will drop drastically. A study has shown that kids that have given in and yelled at their parents have only a 40% chance of getting what they want, while those who stay calm have an average of a 70% chance. Parents hate losing an argument more than anything. Even if you outsmart them, do not let them know. They will only get mad. Parents love to think that they know everything about everything. Always make them think they are right. In order to keep from bursting out carry out a mantra. In case you are unfamiliar with this term, it means to repeat in your mind, "I'm really right, I just don’t want to let them know," over and over. If you don’t lose your temper, they won't lose theirs. Plus, there's always next weekend!

So, if you want weekends full of fun and friends, follow these steps. They guarantee you, if nothing else, a "no screaming match" weekend and possibly a few parties! You may be allowed to do things you never dreamed you could.

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